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This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb.” Psalm 139:13 There are a lot of odd things that people say without thinking. Can I share the #1 way to get on my very last nerve as I snuggle a tiny infant who grew in his mother’s womb? The very worst thing to say? “What number is he? Oh these moms that just keep having babies.” ALL THE FEELINGS! This tiny human that I am holding? He is NOT a problem. He is a miracle. He was woven together by God Himself. God’s eyes saw his unformed body. Every day of his life was planned out before he had lived one of them. He is NOT a problem. He is a gift. A miracle. Every one of our birth moms we have worked with has been a mess- this is why her baby (and usually older children) have ended up being...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  “Even if” prayers are hard. In 2016 NP and I ventured further into the unknown. We had been foster parents for two years, and had had three babies placed with us at that time. Three babies we had loved and hoped for and grieved hard goodbyes. And then suddenly, God steered us down a path of adoption for an older sibling pair who had been in care for years. Their story gripped us, and while the county dragged the process along for months and months before we had even met them, God continued to confirm this was what He wanted us to do. Months went by as the agency weeded out dozens of potential families for L&P. We felt like we were being strung along- like this was some crazy adoption version of the bachelor. We met them. We loved them. We bought bunk beds. And ...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  I’m convinced God created sheep for the sole purpose of showing us what we are like. He explicitly tells us we are like sheep, that He is the Good Shepherd. Sheep are not smart animals. They are incredibly vulnerable and dependent. They cannot survive on their own. Today I drove past a farm and saw a little lamb perched on the end of a log, looking scared and unsure how to get down. I feel you, fluffy friend- my heart identifies with you on multiple levels. Yet shepherds often have a deep affection for the sheep they care for. These helpless creatures form a relational bond. How comforting it is that God is our Good Shepherd. That He sees us in our need. That He inexplicably loves us so deeply. That He sees me stuck on the end of a log and lovingly carries me down....

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  "O Lord, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, hope in the Lord from this time forth and forevermore.” Psalm 131:1-3 I love the imagery in this psalm. A child at rest, simply seeking the comfort of his mother’s presence- not what she can give or provide, just her presence. Today we had the true delight of attending an adoption hearing for our dear friends. It was beautiful. Not the court hearing itself- it actually felt anticlimactic after the long journey they’ve been on, the tireless fighting for their son. But the declaration of his status as t...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series here .  “His lightnings light up the world; the earth sees and trembles. The mountains melt like wax before the Lord, before the Lord of all the earth.” Psalm 97:4-5 That is our God. Speaking the world into existence. Calling each star by name. His very creation trembles and melts before Him. Not only that... “...his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead...” Ephesians 1:19-20 That same power LIVES IN US. Let that sink in for a minute. The God who sustains all things by His powerful word DWELLS IN US. There is nothing easy about fostering. We can begin to feel completely tapped out- nothing left to give. All done now- please stop the ride. I want to get off. But we have everyth...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  “Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,” even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.” Psalm 139:7-12 There is nowhere out of the reach of our omnipresent God- a child does not need to be in OUR home to be loved and reached by OUR God. Last night we sat at a banquet with other foster parents. We sat between two couples who are friends of ours but who did not ye...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  There have been a handful of sermons through the years that have profoundly shaped my faith. One of them is from David Platt- “ The Role of Desperate Prayer in Relenting Wrath .” The truth that God has burned in my heart from this message is that He wills to work through the prayers of His people . In some way that we do  not fully understand, God invites us into His throne room to intercede on behalf of others, to seek His mercy, to ask Him to intervene. It is how He chooses to unfold His plan in our world- our prayers and His response to our prayers are part of His sovereign plan. Mind blowing. What a sacred privilege. What might He do when we ask? What are we missing because we don’t? This truth has become a fundamental approach for us in understanding o...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  Last night I gathered with friends in our living room, continuing a journey together through the book of Acts. I geeked out for a while about the Roman Empire as we discussed Paul’s appeal to Caesar and the dynamics of politics in the empire...  #homeschoolnerdmomalert . . Thinking through how PERFECT God’s timing was for Jesus’ coming amazes me. At  just the right time- with Pax Romana allowing unprecedented stability, with a ruling government that actually instituted crucifixion, with a common language, a renowned system of roads, comparative safety on the Mediterranean - the timing was precise for the coming of the Savior and the explosion of the gospel around the known world. Not one detail was out of His hands. . We serve a God who sets up and takes ...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  “She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: ‘You are the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have now seen the One who sees me.’” Genesis 16:13 In Genesis 16 we find a young servant girl named Hagar, fleeing into the wilderness after being taken advantage of and thrown away. Her life must have seemed to be over. The people she trusted had used and abused her and then turned against her. She was utterly alone and hopeless. Until Jesus showed up. Hagar names God El Roi- the God who sees. When she was most unseen He saw her. When she felt forgotten, He called her by name. When she felt hopeless He gave her direction and hope. When she thought her life was over He spoke of a future. This is El Roi. The Living One who sees. Foster care can be a lonely road. It’s...

This post is part of a month-long series reflecting on truths of Who God is through the alphabet and what those truths mean to us in the midst of our foster care journey. You can find the whole series  here .  At our very first foster training, my husband and I sat down next to a perky Christian couple full of virtue and enthusiasm. The woman (who I seriously think was wearing a denim jumper, at least in this memory), turned to us and said, “So, why do you want to be foster parents?!” My husband and I looked at each other and smiled as we answered together, “We don’t.” It was not the answer she expected ! I still don’t. I’ve tried so hard to stop and God has not allowed us to. Over and over and over again, well meaning people tell us, “I could never do what you’re doing.” “I could only do that if I knew I could keep the baby.” Or the best question, “But is it hard to give them back?” The honest answer? It has wrecked me. It is so hard. I love these babies like they are mi...